-Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
-Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
-It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
I’m thinking the first one. The second one makes the claim that Chuck Norris can be punched, which doesn’t seem possible. Even if it’s from himself. The third assumes Chuck Norris can be controlled, which also fails to meet reality.
How about a comic for:
-Chuck norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Or a bit more risque…
-Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris. (maybe it’s a picture of Chuck Norris punching a cartoon condom)
Nicely done. And it looks like you actually researched or computed pi accurately on the comic too. I’m impressed. I figured you’d just throw up some random numbers.
Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth’s atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he doesn’t push himself up…. he pushes the earth down.
That would be a sweet comic pic.
______________________________
How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck norris? answer: all of it.
…and another. I just realized that I had this one sitting around for awhile. I’m not sure why I never put it up. Maybe because this is the first one without Chuck Norris actually in the comic!?!
Here are some Chuck Facts I'd like visualised…
-Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
-Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
-It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
Discuss…
I’m thinking the first one. The second one makes the claim that Chuck Norris can be punched, which doesn’t seem possible. Even if it’s from himself. The third assumes Chuck Norris can be controlled, which also fails to meet reality.
Done. Any other requests?
I’d like to see ‘the chief export of Chuck Norris is pain’
Hmm. That might be tricky. I’ll see what I can do.
I’m thinking Chuck at the docks with a bunch of contanters that read:
PAIN
Brought to you by Chuck Inc.
Yes. A whole container ship. The USS Pain. Or maybe the CNS Pain would be more appropriate. And Chuck would, of course, be laughing maniacally.
Done.
How about a comic for:
-Chuck norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Or a bit more risque…
-Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris. (maybe it’s a picture of Chuck Norris punching a cartoon condom)
A bit more risque? That's saying a mouthful. I think the first one is a better choice :-)
Done.
I’d like to see a comic for Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
New Norris Comic up. Check it out.
(reply to scott) Done.
Nicely done. And it looks like you actually researched or computed pi accurately on the comic too. I’m impressed. I figured you’d just throw up some random numbers.
This ain’t no low brow comic strip. This is high quality stuff. Chuck Norris only deserves the best.
I’d like to see this fact as a comic:
Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth’s atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
The Norris has landed…
Awesome. Although I had assumed Chuck would be telling those NASA eggheads “where’s my beer b!+h@$!”
In a way, he is. The power of a Chuck Norris stare can have the same effect.
New comic up.
New Norris. Check it out…
Chuck Norris blows, i can beat Chuck Norris in a fight any day! Yeah!
Ignorance is kung fu bliss.
How bout the mastercard one:
Nunchucks: $50
Ninja Suit: $130
Personalized Black Belt: $75
Watching Chuck Norris beat up and devour an 8 year old Cambodian Orphan: Priceless.
Hail Chuck (new comic up)
Nice work on the new comic.
Is chuck norris really human?
Well, yes and no. If you count supernatural strength and masculinity as being a human quality, then yes, he is human.
chuck norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves
while al queda flies planes into buildings, chuck norris roundhouse kicks buildings into planes
i want to see
a kid can piss his name into the snow, but chuck norris can piss his name into concrete
When chuck norris jumps in a pool he doesnt get wet, the water get chuck norrissed
I want to see
The most honorable way to die is by taking a bullet for chuck norris.
This amuses him for he is bullet proof.
Chuck Norris’ tears can cure any disease
Chuck Norris once swallowed a whole Rubic’s cube, when he crapped it out it was solved.
count to ten. thats how log it will take chuck norris to kill you. 47 times.
chuck norris got his driving licens at 16. seconds
chuck norris got a perfect score on his SATs by simply writing chuck norris for every answer
chuck norris’s IQ can simply be expressed as a sideways 8
chuck norris once roundhouse kicked a salesman. over the phone
yes in fact chuck norris does live in a round house
chuck norris had a heart attack. his heart lost
as a child chuck norris trick-or-treated as himself
Please is the magic word as in “Please don’t kill me.” Chuck Norris does not beleive in magic
MC Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris most certainly *can* touch this.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he doesn’t push himself up…. he pushes the earth down.
That would be a sweet comic pic.
______________________________
How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck norris? answer: all of it.
There is no theory of evelotuion justa list of animals chuck norris allows to live!
omg, thats the best one ever!
Judt gotta say i love your work and how you make chuck norris face look so sneaky…
awsome:)
Chuck Norris created giraffes by uppercutting a horse.
i love chuck norris baby!! he is the best!!! kisses bye bye
evelotuion! OMG,thats awsome! :)
my favorite ones are:
Chuck Norris once lost his remote control, but maintained control by yelling at the TV between bites of his “filet o’ child”
if you had $5 and Chuck Norris had $5, Chuck Norris would have more money than you.
After a hard night partying, Chuck Norris does not throw up, Chuck throws down.
It’s been awhile (new comic up).
Another one up.
…and another. I just realized that I had this one sitting around for awhile. I’m not sure why I never put it up. Maybe because this is the first one without Chuck Norris actually in the comic!?!
These are my favorite:
Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can’t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris
Can’t touch this…oh, wait (new comic up).